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GratefulMom
Member
Username: Keybordrfm
Post Number: 6
Registered: 10-2009
| | Posted on Friday, January 08, 2010 - 04:10 pm: | 
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My son has a degree in marketing and theater. (Yeah, I know. I should have talked him out of that one!) Not surprisingly, he hadn't found a job at the time he suddenly became ill, then received an emergency liver transplant. Now, four months out, he's floundering. The jobs that are advertised require lifting more weight than he's allowed to do, or are in dirty environments he's been told to avoid. He was uncertain about his future before his illness, and now he spends all day playing video games in the rec room, avoiding even any discussion of what's next for him. He was always good in math and computer programming, and he's talked about going back to school, but he doesn't make any positive movements toward that either. I think he feels like his life is over at 25. What kinds of jobs do you who have successfully recovered from a liver transplant hold? |
Frank J.
Member
Username: Txaggie86
Post Number: 120
Registered: 03-2009
| | Posted on Friday, January 08, 2010 - 05:43 pm: |
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I think any type of job, except for garbage collectors, warehouse work and on the sales floor would work. Marketing jobs would be ideal. He would be in an inside environment, mainly at a desk. Also, Computer-related positions would be good. Though, the hazard in that field is being out sourced.
Check to see if your state has a transplant foundation (for example http://www.gatransplant.org/).
If they do, they might have retraining and mentoring programs. I would really suggest he get mentoring from a liver recipient!!!!
Frank Jones
Liver Transplant
Emory University Hospital, Atlanta, GA
April 2005 and April 2006.
Anyone who considers protocol unimportant has never dealt with a cat. - Robert A. Heinlein |
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Joe Berry
Member
Username: Joe910
Post Number: 102
Registered: 08-2008
| | Posted on Friday, January 08, 2010 - 11:09 pm: |
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I am two years out and have successfully went back to work as a consultant in hospital billing departments. I also do some automation and programming during my consulting assignments.
With a marketing background, your son should be able to work in almost any industry since he would work in an office. Now, finding a job can be an issue, especially for someone who doesn't have experience. Today finding a job is really difficult. With the theatre background, I would think he could do a killer interview, but today that doesn't go to far.
To a degree, I understand what your son is going through. Jobs are not easy to find. I went back to work part time at six weeks post transplant. I was employed at a hospital for over four years prior to transplant. I went back full time at six months. At 11 months I had to resign - I just couldn't do the job, I was too tired. I was one of the few that took almost 16 months to fully recover. I had went back to work too soon. After I felt well enough to work again, I could not find another job.
There are two points, maybe your son is still recuperating, either physically or mentally or both. At four months I was still on Prednisone and it caused me some emotional issues. Between that and the fatigue, I had issues. My concentration was not as sharp as it had been and emotional state was a little less stable. These two issues did not clear up until about 16 months out. This could impact his desire to get into the job market. Depression could also be a factor. While he may not look like he has been through a trauma recently, he has.
Your son is much younger than my 60 years; however, transplants seem not too care about age. I have a 30 something friend who had a liver transplant six months before I did. She still has issues with fatigue.
I hope that some of this helps in some small way.
Joe Berry, Peoria, IL USA
Diagnosed with PSC and UC in 1990
Liver Transplant 10-17-2007
Northwestern Memorial, Chicago, IL |
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Diane
Forum Leader
Username: Mary_diane
Post Number: 337
Registered: 02-2009
| | Posted on Saturday, January 09, 2010 - 03:40 am: |
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Hi Grateful Mom,
I totally agree with Joe's points. I am 13 months from my liver transplant and still deal with some fatigue, so I am not yet back at work, and feeling a little frustrated.
It also sounds as though your son may be somewhat depressed, which is not uncommon. For many of us the full impact of what has happened to us does not really hit home for a few months because of a variety of factors including medications, the fact that he was likely so sick before that he could not process all that was going on, and most of us are fatigued.
Although I am double your son's age, I was still VERY tired at 4 months. Does he have any source of income such as Disability pensions that he can rely on for a little longer? If so, I would say whatever you can do to add to the support you already are giving would be the best.
My partner did EVERYTHING for the first 3 months. By 4 months even though I didn't really feel like doing much I would force myself to get up and help him with what I could.....but I also have had a lot more life experience.
Has your son shown any interest in this site, and does he have a good support network outside of immediate family?
I wish your son the best of luck. He is very young to be going through all of this. I also want to acknowledge you. I know from other experiences that being the caregiver is a very HARD role at times, especially when moods are labile because of prednisone. So I hope that you too are receiving as much support as possible.
Diane
Liver Transplant Nov 20, 2008
Vancouver General, BC
“Sometimes our light goes out but is blown again into flame by an encounter with another human being. Each of us owes the deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this inner light.”
Albert Schweitzer
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Frank J.
Member
Username: Txaggie86
Post Number: 121
Registered: 03-2009
| | Posted on Saturday, January 09, 2010 - 11:40 am: |
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Grateful Mom,
I would have to agree with Joe and Diane. Give him time to recover physically and mentally. I did not do much of anything for at least 6 months. Only after 6 months did I think of going back to work.
Suggest to him to create a journal on Facebook recounting his journey. Keep in mind potential employers might see his site. A lot of employers do web searches during the interview process...
Once he has started thinking about work (on his own schedule), transform the account into an extended resume. Also, look at Linked-in.
Also, don't worry about weight limitations. Employer's are willing to work around that.
Best of luck
Frank Jones
Liver Transplant
Emory University Hospital, Atlanta, GA
April 2005 and April 2006.
Don't ever become a pessimist... a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun, and neither can stop the march of events. - Robert A. Heinlein |
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CJ
Member
Username: Still_standing
Post Number: 276
Registered: 11-2008
| | Posted on Saturday, January 09, 2010 - 10:11 pm: |
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The fatigue the first year is overwhelming. I didn't go back to work until 6 months after my transplant. I used to do meeting planning. They replaced me while I was out. I didn't expect that I had worked in that position for 10 years. I still work for the same association but I just do admin work now. It's a paycheck and health insurance for which I'm grateful. Quite honestly it's boring and I sometimes miss the overwhelming work load I used to carry. That being said I don't miss the travel or the high stress or long days during the meetings.
It may take a while to find a job in this economy. I wouldn't recommend anything too taxing because it really does take a long time to get your energy levels back.
If my transplant didn't happen at the time of a recession I probably would have changed jobs by now. I don't plan to tell a potential employer about my transplant. I feel like I am being held back from work I can do because of my transplant. People freak out when I go to lift something and I just want to smack someone. I wonder how they think I grocery shop or pick up things at the store? Anyway I'm getting off track. Give him time he needs it anyway to heal.
I also had an emergency transplant. I fell apart on a daily basis afterwards for a while. Everything made me cry I have never had such a hard time getting my emotions under control. One of my doctors told me it's like that for people who have this happen to them suddenly. It really does take a while to absorb what has happened to you and adjust to the changes in your life. Give him a little space it takes time physically and mentally to bounce back from this. His life is not over. On a personal level I enjoy and appreciate my life very much now.
I don't keep my transplant a secret at all in my personal life I share it with anyone who wants to listen. On a professional level I would recommend caution. People view you differently and it can impact your ability to grow in a job.
Best of luck I hope your son feels better soon.
CJ
Liver Transplant
3/1/08
Maryland |
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Mohan
Member
Username: Mraghavan
Post Number: 44
Registered: 12-2009
| | Posted on Sunday, January 10, 2010 - 02:50 pm: |
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I concur with everyone else. I work for the State and they did a lot to get me through my emergency transplant. I was at home for 3 months before going back to work, but looking back, I feel I should have waited another couple of months.
Emotional trauma is a big part of the transplant. As others have said, it takes a few months for things to kick in. I would suggest that you allow your son time to put the pieces of his life back together. Encourage him to turn to friends and people he looks up to for support. Also, check with your transplant center about a support group or post transplant counseling.
After talking to other transplantees, and from reading through the posts in this forum, I now know that fatigue is a part of post-transplant life. I have a desk job, but still have a rough time leaving for work in the morning and making it through a full day. So, this is something that has to be considered when looking for a job. Ideally, a job in which he could work from home when health requires it would be something to look for.
Mohan
Liver Transplant 04/18/2009
University of Colorado Hospital |
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Mashka
Member
Username: Mashka
Post Number: 63
Registered: 11-2009
| | Posted on Sunday, January 10, 2010 - 04:44 pm: |
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Hi Greatful Mom,
I am 2 years older than your son and also had acute liver failure.
Mine was also not so long ago *aug 09 actually.
I had an office job when this happened, accounting, and was lucky that they didnt lay me off and just put me on disability and now I am back there working..
I am very lucky that i had a job to return to. it actually made me feel so much better, to have a routine, to feel "normal" again.
But honestly, with all these dr appointments all the time and blood work, I worry that they will get sick of it and fire me. I honestly cant imagine going to interviews at this moment. I cant imagine what your son is going through. Going on interviews and looking for a job is so stressful on a regular person, and to add all these emotions he must be going through at the moment, it must be real rough.
If I was in his place I would look for a part time job, maybe even an internship! And with marketing im sure most work would be office work anyway so it shouldnt be a problem.
also the lifting restrictions come down as he's gonna get stronger.
When I just got out of surgery and a month or so passed, I couldnt walk and carry a bottle or water in my hand. Now im at the gym running and doing squats and deadlifts with no problems  so he'll be fine he just needs time.
If you can afford it, maybe he should go to counciling / talk therapy... I will be loooking for this myself. You probably think he's ok but he might not be and he might not be able to discuss his problems with you because he might feel very different and that no one understands him... I just say this based on how i feel, everyone thinks you're ok because physically you look good, but there is crazy stuff that goes on in your head after this happens...
Liver transplant 8.14.09
Mount Sinai, NY |
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CiscoKidney07
Forum Leader
Username: Gregg
Post Number: 3016
Registered: 03-2008
| | Posted on Monday, January 11, 2010 - 11:20 am: |
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GratefulMom, I am not a liver recipient, I am a kidney recipient. However, what I did want to address is something that Mashka has all ready touched on. His strength will come back. When I was released after surgery, it was three months before I even tried to pick up any weight, so I got on the treadmill and walked. At that point, I was told not to lift any more than ten pounds. At three months, they told me to go slow, but before long, that was 40 pounds. Now, I am a regular gym rat. The other thing is, Mashka is right--have him talk to someone. In the meantime, understand that exercise is a great outlet for stress. Good luck to you and your son.
| There are not too many things in life worth working my butt off for, but my health is one of them |
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Frank J.
Member
Username: Txaggie86
Post Number: 123
Registered: 03-2009
| | Posted on Monday, January 11, 2010 - 11:37 am: |
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Grateful Mom,
What state are y'all in?
Frank Jones
Liver Transplant
Emory University Hospital, Atlanta, GA
April 2005 and April 2006.
Don't ever become a pessimist... a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun, and neither can stop the march of events. - Robert A. Heinlein |
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J'me
Member
Username: Gardentherapist
Post Number: 20
Registered: 12-2009
| | Posted on Thursday, January 14, 2010 - 02:37 pm: |
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Hi GratefulMom,
I recently read book atbout a young man to won a broze olymplic metal at the Utach Olympic two years after this transplant. This tell me that anything is possible, provided the person has the motivation/
The s an opporunity for son to explore what he really wants to do with his life, not what he is able to do or who will hire him There are many tools on the internet, and college websites that can help him find his strengths, challenges, interests and purpose (Meyer's Briggs. Kiesey). The Occupational Handbook answers practical questions regarding the nature of the work, compensation, lifting demand and future trends.He may be able to teach therater or work on someone's production or put together himself. The world is his oyster and he gets to pick what the future holds. If he finds something that put demands on him physically, he will need put effort into increasing his stamina. If he as able to discover his passion, it will motivate him to do what he can to live a fulfilling life. The difficult part is over. He now gets to explore what he can give back to the world. This might mean going back to school or starting from the bottom. But ever way his confidence will be built and his success give increase his confidence.
I have a background in Career Counseling so if you have any questions just ask.
Be Blessed,
J'me
J'me
Liver Transplant HCV, HCC
Scheduled for February 2010
Cleveland Clinic, Ohio |
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Frank J.
Member
Username: Txaggie86
Post Number: 125
Registered: 03-2009
| | Posted on Thursday, January 14, 2010 - 09:03 pm: |
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J'me,
I think I know the guy you are talking about. He is a snow boarder. He had his transplant at Emory.
One of our forum members, Terri, is a liver transplant recipient. She runs marathons and volunteers at a hospital.
Frank Jones
Liver Transplant
Emory University Hospital, Atlanta, GA
April 2005 and April 2006.
Don't ever become a pessimist... a pessimist is correct oftener than an optimist, but an optimist has more fun, and neither can stop the march of events. - Robert A. Heinlein |
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Melanie
Member
Username: Melanie
Post Number: 2
Registered: 10-2009
| | Posted on Saturday, January 16, 2010 - 11:37 pm: |
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Hi grateful Mom
I had my transplant in July 2008 after a sudden acute liver failure. I think because I was so ill prior to the surgery, recovery has been quite slow. I returned to work part time after a year, and find it tough some days. Your son may be still in shock-something like this is traumatic physically and emotionally. My life has changed profoundly, dealing with fatigue, medications, and some of the weird side effects of immunosuppressants. I would find jumping so soon difficult. What helped me was a few months of getting my personal life back. Encourage him to socialize with his friends, to go outside and walk to build strength, to take up the activities and sports or hobbies he enjoyed, and perhaps to do some volunteer work with agencies or theatre groups. He could build his stamina, skills and confidence, and know what his body will tolerate. I teach at a small university, so the job isn't physically demanding apart from lectures, and I have the luck to schedule my work in my way. But I stil work part time. I find I get little infections and miseries as I call them more than I did before. But i do benefit from being lucky enough to go slow. So talk to him, or encourage him to talk to friends or the transplant center, and go slow.
Teaching, research, design-any job with some flexibility is ideal. For me, working and establishing work relationships helped all aspects of my recovery.
Your wonderful to be concerned. |
Starzl1971tx
Member
Username: Starzl1971tx
Post Number: 7
Registered: 01-2010
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 19, 2010 - 11:51 am: |
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Let me preface this by saying you have lots of suggestions to read. I don't know your son, but am trying to read between the lines of your post to figure him out.
So, just two cents and another war story for what it is worth... I had kidney tx, April 1971, was kept in hosp for 42 days, partly due to profound rejection which was treated with whole body radiation... and went back to work part time August 1971. I have always had a job since, completed education, managed departments, etc etc ...
The reason I went back to work was money. We had none. A military family almost requires 2 incomes just to get by, even though my dh was a SGT. Going back to work was the best thing in the world that could have happened to me, being forced to get out every day.
Of course, the job was not a good job, not what I was used to doing and not well paying. I walked 4 blocks to a grocery store, sitting down literally on the sidewalk every block. to get my strength back. Then I stood up for 4 hours and did my job, and walked home again. Yes, I was very tired. Yes, all my hair had fallen out and wigs looked funny. Pred made my face puff up... you can imagine how cute I was with sticks for arms and legs and moon for a face. I was on 30 (THIRTY) mg of pred a day.
But the incentive of getting enough money together to get our daughter back from in-laws who had decided to keep her forever was sure a push. It was December before that happened, and we had to have a cousin go and physically take her, with literally just the clothes on her back, and put her on the plane to us. It took a lot to forgive that, but the in-laws thought they were doing the best thing, so we finally did get over it.
So, although tx specialists had told us that I would never even be able to do my own housework, that I would stay a 90 pound weakling the rest of my life, circumstances changed that.
So, it might be time for some tough love. What incentive would work for your son? Shouldn't he pay rent? Get your son up and off the computer!! Muscles that are not used just get weaker. Stop talking about it, and just do it. Talk talk talk... he has stopped listening.
Okay... do not mean to hurt your feelings and hope that I did not. He is not a doll to be wrapped up in cotton and protected, he is a grown man and you should respect that and treat him as one.
Starz
Kidney failure 1970; dialysis Jan 1971 through April 1971, Baptist Hospital, Memphis, TN; kidney transplant 4/30/1971, Colorado General, Denver, CO. Hurray! Back to work in August 1971. Life is wonderful.
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ono
Member
Username: Ono
Post Number: 64
Registered: 06-2009
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 19, 2010 - 08:39 pm: |
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My tp was last April. It takes longer to heal than 4months. I keep feeling better and better.
There are an infinite number of jobs he will be able to do,including lifting heavy weights, just not right now.
Is he exercising? He should be.
Tell him to start and continue to increase if only taking longer walks every day. Moving is good for everything. Fresh air is great for the brain. He doesn't need a job now but he needs some outlet. Does he play music or draw?
He may need time to himself to process what he's gone through and he may not want to discuss it with you. Sometimes we as parents, need to let go and just let our kids be.
Good luck to you both,
Ono |
Caroline
Member
Username: Carolined
Post Number: 2
Registered: 12-2009
| | Posted on Wednesday, January 20, 2010 - 10:53 pm: |
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My husband took almost a year after his transplant before he could go into the workplace, although he did have a hip replacement in the meantime. He was very ill before his transplant too - only on the list for a couple of days. He does voluntary work at a local primary school one morning a week now. It's a big jump going from being really ill to full time employment. Part time voluntary work helps with self-esteem, helps him feel useful and working with young kids is fun (he used to be a high school teacher). Maybe your son could do some part-time voluntary work to dip his toe into the outside world - help build back his confidence. |
Mohan
Member
Username: Mraghavan
Post Number: 45
Registered: 12-2009
| | Posted on Thursday, January 21, 2010 - 03:46 pm: |
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It's been nine months this week since my transplant, and fatigue is still a big issue for me. Again, I think going back to work full time too soon is a big part of it.
A part-time volunteer job for a couple of months, just to get back on your feet, would be a great idea.
Mohan
Liver Transplant 04/18/2009
University of Colorado Hospital |
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Renee
Member
Username: Reneewilliams
Post Number: 2
Registered: 01-2010
| | Posted on Monday, January 25, 2010 - 06:33 pm: |
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Hey Mom--I'm a liver transplant recipient and I'm now a lawyer (oddly, I was a theatre major in undergrad like your son). I don't think there is anything transplant patients CAN'T do...after a few years of course. And keep in mind, my transplant was 25 years ago (when I was 14 months old). Has your son considered getting an MHA (masters in health administration)? Maybe going back to school? |
Hilary
Member
Username: Cowgirlhilary301
Post Number: 14
Registered: 05-2009
| | Posted on Thursday, January 28, 2010 - 12:59 pm: |
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I believe liver transplant recipients can hold any job. Like anyone else, it is a matter of finding something you have a passion for. Maybe he could start volunteering or going to work with a family member or friend (to observe and help out). Or work part time. Or take a class or two at a community college. Not knowing him personally or anything, but I feel he needs to get out and start doing SOMETHING, and then once he is back "in the waters" of life he can tune his interests and find the right job.
My (second) transplant was when I was in college, and I had withdrawn from classes that semester before the surgery but about 1 month post I went back and got involved in student groups and volunteering and working as a peer mentor. Then I picked up classes the following semester. I currently work in a hospital/doctors office getting insurance approval for specialty meds and procedures, etc and coordinating care with pharmacies etc. Prior to this I did research in psychiatry, and I also went back to school for an MA in psychology.
~Hilary~
2-time liver recipient 07.20.1996 and 03.01.2001 Dallas, TX
Transplant Games Athlete, Tennis/Swimming
Team Nations Capital |
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panchitaruiz
Member
Username: Panchitaruiz
Post Number: 68
Registered: 01-2009
| | Posted on Saturday, February 20, 2010 - 02:44 am: |
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I'm at a very similar cross road as your son atm! I was in the last semester of my senior year of high school when i had my emergency transplant-i was on the list for 2 days. I had zero idea what i wanted to do BEFORE my transplant and i'm still lost after. Of course, my choices have narrowed-I've always wanted to work with kids(which i have done after my transplant), but it has limited the ages of children I'm willing/should work with.
I'm not sure if maybe your son is feeling very similarly as how i did, but my life changed so fast (literally i woke up one day in the hospital being told i had a liver transplant!). I had a very difficult time getting used to my new body and routine. I had zero time to prepare for it and it wasn't like it was something i knew would be coming in my future, it was just kind of like BAM i wake up with a new life.
My best friends mom gave me my first job after my transplant-are there family and friends that could help out with that? I'm now a nanny and I have not disclosed to the families that i've had a liver transplant-Maybe this is part of your sons fear? Being discriminated against because of his condition?
Hang in there! I'm living on my own doing my own thing now and i'm sure your son will figure it out soon enough! He's VERY lucky to have you
Francesca
fulminant hepatitis
Liver transplant '07
UCLA |
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GratefulMom
Member
Username: Keybordrfm
Post Number: 8
Registered: 10-2009
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 02, 2010 - 10:44 pm: |
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Everyone who wrote responses was wonderful! Thank you so much. I thought I would give everyone an update. It is now 9 months after my son's transplant. He has just accepted a part-time job at an office supplies store. He was honest with them about his transplant in the interviews and they were fine with his explanation of why he hadn't worked for a while. And he's getting married in three days. His strength did come back, and he's going to the park, walking and doing exercises, which improves his outlook as well as his stamina.
What really seemed to help was at 5 months or so, he accepted a role in a play in a community theatre group near here. It gave him three rehearsals a week to attend for a couple of months, and it gave him back some of his confidence. His life is looking up now. He still hasn't found the job he'd really like to have, but he finally will have a paycheck. His soon-to-be wife is wonderful, (they became engaged in ICU while waiting for the new liver), and she is helping him reenter a social life. I think he's going to be okay. Thanks for the encouragement! |
Joe Berry
Forum Leader
Username: Joe910
Post Number: 197
Registered: 08-2008
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 02, 2010 - 11:27 pm: |
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Thanks for the update. It is great to hear "the rest of the story."
Joe Berry, Peoria, IL USA
Forum Leader
Diagnosed with PSC and UC in 1990
Liver Transplant 10-17-2007
Northwestern Memorial, Chicago, IL |
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